A child of God believes that marriage is a gift from God, one that should not be taken for granted. It is the right atmosphere to engage in sexual relations and to build a family life. Christian or not, marriage is difficult for any couple to sustain over a lifetime. Life’s trials—the pressure of making a living, of parenting, of resisting temptations to unfaithfulness or selfishness—can strain any marriage. But there is hope for a child of God. The hope that a husband and wife, by intentionally choosing to learn how to love faithfully and sacrificially as Jesus did, would keep their covenant promises for a lifetime.

A. Marriage is God’s doing

1. The most foundational thing to see from the Bible about marriage is that it is God’s doing. Marriage is God’s doing because it was His design in the creation of man as male and female [Genesis 1:27–28.] It is God Himself who decreed that man’s solitude was not good, and God Himself set out to complete one of the central designs of creation, that is He made a being perfectly suited for him that is a woman. Marriage is also God’s doing because He took the role of being the first Father to give away the bride. Genesis 2:22 says: “And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man.” Then God gave away the first bride. He didn’t hide her and make Adam seek. He made her; then He brought her. And now, though she was His by virtue of creation, He gave her to the man in this absolutely new kind of relationship called marriage, unlike every other relationship in the world.

2. Marriage is God’s doing because God gave the earliest and the first blueprint for the marriage relationship. In Genesis 2:24 we read, ”A man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” Genesis 2:24.

3. Lastly, God joins a husband and a wife into a one-flesh union. The world does not know this, which is one of the reasons why marriage is treated so casually. And Christians often act like they don’t know it, which is one of the reasons marriage in the presence of God is not seen as the wonder it is.

When two people understand that marriage is the greatest commitment you can make to another human being, it makes for an exciting and lasting relationship. It means they understand God’s design and intent of marriage and God has definite purposes.

B. To reflect the image of God

1. Marriage seeks to reflect the image of God. God creates “them” as a unit to reflect Him. It takes both a man and woman, in oneness, to truly reflect His image. It may not be perfect and the road may be long, as Paul notes: “Those who marry will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this.” 1 Corinthians 7:28 But God, in His ultimate perfection, created marriage to reflect His goodness, tenderness, faithfulness, steadfastness and love. A husband and a wife will show all of these traits to one another, especially during difficult times.

2. Marriage also means not being afraid to openly rebuke in love; a couple should still sharpen one another in kindness. Yes God created our marriage to make us more Christ-like.

C. To mirror Christ’s relationship with the church

God intends in marriage to mirror Christ’s relationship with the Church. In fact the union between two people mirrors Christ’s relationship with His church.

1. As it is stated in Colossians and Ephesians, a Godly husband should love his wife as Christ loves His church and the wife should respect her husband. This doesn’t have to be interpreted as degrading or submissive. Instead, it’s gentle and giving.

2. The husband and wife are equal to God, but play different roles. This ultimately allows a husband and a wife to become nurturing to one another while becoming holy and blameless before God. One way to visualize this is to imagine Jesus at the end of the aisle, waiting for His bride to be presented. In this scenario, the bride is us – His church. That’s what is so exciting about marriage; two people should be going uphill towards the image of Christ.

3. A marriage seeks to serve others together. It seeks to become the very bearer of Christ.

D. Marriage is a means to witness to the world

1. Jesus said “By this shall all men know that you are my disciples if you have love one for another” (John 13:35). Marriage is a significant institution by which a lost world can see Christianity in action. Marriage is the most intimate of human relationships in which husbands and wives learn to model Christ’s love.

2. It is the 18-year training ground for children so that they can also love “one another.” Marriage provides a unique opportunity to reflect Him as a couple and provides a platform for accomplishing God’s intentions for mankind.

3. Christian home is the greatest opportunity for evangelism. That means opening our home to the hurting, counselling couples and individuals together, and living on mission together. Marriage is not mainly about being or staying in love or is not simply a relationship in which we get to pursue our personal agendas of feeling good. It’s mainly about telling the truth with our lives. It’s about portraying something true about Jesus Christ and the way He relates to His people. It is about showing in real life the glory of the Gospel and therefore is an opportunity to glorify God and show the world what He’s all about.

4. Marriage is not only from Him and through Him, it is also for Him. Marriage is designed by God to display His glory in a way that no other event or institution does. The Apostle Paul quotes Genesis 2:24 in Ephesians chapter 5 verse 31: “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” Then he gives it this all-important interpretation in verse 32: “This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.” In other words, marriage is patterned after Christ’s covenant commitment to His redeemed people, the church. Therefore, the highest meaning and the most ultimate purpose of marriage is to put the covenant relationship of Christ and His church on display.

E. Lesson of self- sacrifice

God intends that we learn the vital lesson of self-sacrifice in our everyday life. Marriage involves sacrifice – of time, of our needs and of our own desires. Marriage is one of the ultimate sacrifices because we‘re willingly giving ourselves for the rest of our life. We’re committing to one person until God calls us home. This sacrifice in marriage reflects the giving nature and grace of God.

F. To be fruitful and multiply

1. God’s another purpose for marriage is to reproduce: God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it” (Genesis 1:28a). Marriage is an opportunity for men and women to produce children.

2. Children are a gift from God and with them comes great responsibility: children are to be raised in His “likeness.” (Though many married couples do not have children, they still have an opportunity to disciple others to conform to His “likeness.”)

3. According to this verse, married couples are to “subdue” the earth. To accomplish this requires good stewardship in the physical realm over that which God has given

4. It also requires diligence in the spiritual realm. A spiritual battle goes on in every heart. Only as couples come together in unity and oneness will the enemy of our souls be defeated. Just as the Godhead represents perfect unity and is a force for God’s will in His universe, the Christian couple is to pray and discern God’s will in all situations. Together married couples are to be “soldiers” directed by God to accomplish His intentions on earth.

G. For companionship

1. Genesis 2 tells us the story of the first man, Adam, and Adam’s need for companionship. Human beings are, at our very core, relational creatures. We are relational like our Creator is relational. God placed the man in Eden and commissioned him as Eden’s caretaker. And then we come to this very telling verse: The LORD, God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a companion who will help him” (Genesis 2:18). Indeed, God, Himself, took the responsibility to make this perfect companion for the man. The God-created person specifically designed for such a role was not another man, it was a WOMAN.

2. When Jesus gave a glimpse of the magnificent view of marriage that God willed for His people, the disciples said to Him, “If such is the case of a man with his wife, it is better not to marry” (Matthew 19:10). In other words, Christ’s vision of the meaning of marriage was so enormously different from that of the disciples, they could not imagine it to be a good thing. Our own sin and selfishness and cultural bondage makes it almost impossible for us to feel the wonder of God’s purpose for marriage. The present day view of marriage is very distorted but the purpose of God for marriage is higher and deeper and stronger and more glorious than anything our culture—or perhaps we ourselves—ever imagined. The greatness and glory of marriage is beyond our ability to think or feel without divine revelation and without the illuminating and awakening work of the Holy Spirit. The world cannot know what marriage is without learning it from God.

Marriage filters in grace and breathes out grace. It means that a couple shows the same patience and grace to one another that God shows us daily. A couple doesn’t choose certain days to show grace; it’s a daily pouring out. They don’t give up when times get very difficult, frustrating and painful; they get stronger and braver. In 1 Corinthians 13:8, it reads, “Love never fails.” God never fails. Therefore, a marriage centred upon Christ should never fail.

Maintaining a godly perspective of the purpose of marriage provides the foundation for a successful marriage relationship. Marriage becomes a spiritual endeavour rather than being dependent on financial status, bearing children, or securing a specific employment. Being able to fulfil God’s intended pattern and purpose for marriage should motivate wise couple to develop Christ-like character

Questions to ponder:

Loneliness is the first thing which God named “not good”. What did he do about it?

What do you understand the “helper” or “help meet “ to mean?

In Genesis 2:24, God says, “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.”

What kind of relationship is this?

How are these two people held together?

Can they walk away from this relationship?

Can they go from spouse to spouse?

Is this relationship rooted in romance? Sexual desire? Need for companionship? Cultural convenience?