Our Dear Rajan,

Your mother and I are always interested to know even the minor developments in your personal life. It is not to deprive you of your privacy, but rather to help you to grow.

We were not disappointed to hear that you have scored very low marks in your midterm exams. Of course, we were surprised to hear the news because we know how hard you had prepared for this exam. If your performance was poor because of your neglect or laziness, we would surely have been disappointed. Faithfulness to one’s call and hard work are expected of every Christian, irrespective of his state or stage in life. Once he takes care of these two things, he need not worry about the outcome. Occasionally the Lord allows or causes His children to fail in spite of their hard work. He has his own good reasons for this. We can rest assured that even though all things are not good in themselves, they still work together for good to them that have been called according to God’s purpose.

The idea of competition is an integral part of man’s thinking. This is why there are many exams and competitions. It is not out of necessity but out of this interest that people participate in many competitions. But the human thinking introduces a false element when it is implied that losing means failure. One should understand very clearly that wherever there is a possibility of winning, there will be more possibilities of losing. Since all people cannot win, many will lose.

A loss is a failure only if it is the result of neglect. Many opportunities will present themselves to us in our lives. We will also have to undergo many types of evaluations in our student and professional lives. Not recognising these opportunities or occasions of evaluation (say, the exams) will cause many people to lose. A good proportion of students never realise the importance of proper preparations for their exams, so every year at the exam time they go through a sad routine: recollecting all the spiritual instructions which they have ever received, they try to become as pious as possible, praying to the Lord that if somehow, He helps them to pass the exam just this one time, then they will study faithfully ever after. But once the exams are over, they forget it all and the same routine repeats itself during the next exam, and so on. This is definitely failure, because the person is not learning to use his opportunities. So, losing in an exam is not failure, but losing as a result of not preparing for the exam is definitely a failure.

Once we understand that a loss does not mean failure, we are ready to overcome the psychological price which many are paying. Every loss looks like a failure and it is devastating them. But if losses are seen in the right perspective, they offer many benefits to us:

1. Every person has limitations specific to him. It is sheer fantasy to think that one can accomplish every-thing that one wants. A more realistic approach to life dawns when we face the losses and limitations in the right attitude.

2. Once a person becomes addicted to seeing only success in his life, he will develop such imbalance in his life that all of real life looks twisted to him. It will seem to him that all the people in this world are trying to hinder his success. Accepting the presence of short-comings and failures in life makes a person look at life more objectively.

3. The greatest enemy of dynamic life is the fear of failure. Such a person tends to stay out of everything to minimise the possibility of losses and failures. But a willingness to face both sides of real life opens up all sorts of exciting possibilities.

I have only tried to give a few pointers to you to suggest the vast scope that the Lord has in using failures for our good. One needs only to study the Old Testament stories to see how even the greatest servants of the Lord failed and how the Lord used that for unimaginable good.

Losses and failures should always be seen against the broad background of this real world. Success and failures will always be here with us. A loss in life becomes a failure only if it is the result of continued neglect, escapism, and unwillingness to face life as it is. But if one is faithful from his side on all counts, then whatever losses come to him should be seen only as a state allowed by God to realise His plans in our lives.

Since you had really worked hard for your exams. and since you tried your best to perform, we are more than satisfied with you. The result does not disappoint us. The Lord surely wants to teach you (and also us) some important lesson(s). Be cheerful and study hard. Be diligent in your personal and group Bible studies.

With All Love, As Always, Your Daddy & Mummy

TOM & ANN.