When two Christians marry, they enter into a solemn covenant with each other. The promises and vows they make in the presence of God are often symbolised by the giving of rings or a thali. In many parts of the world today these promises and vows are lightly regarded, divorce and unfaithfulness are common among Christians. The marriage vows are so deeply part of God’s creation that His Spirit describes them in Gen 2: 24 even before sin came into the world “For this reason (marriage) a man will leave his father and mother and be united with his wife, and they will become one flesh.” Thus, God shows us how carefully He has planned the beautiful, creative relationship between man and a woman. It is a relationship which God likens to His relationship with Israel. God chose Israel to love her (Deut. 7:7) not because she was more attractive than the other nations but because God takes delight in loving the needy, the out- casts, the despised ones. This love is covenant love, because He remains faithful to His promise. God’s love for His people is born from eternity in His mind. It flows strongly from His will. God does not change His mind. Nobody can stand against His determination to love His people. In the same way Christ loves the church. In Ezekiel 16, God describes how He courted Israel as His wife and married her (v8) with a covenant. But Israel was unfaithful continually and indulged in spiritual adultery. However, God would not cast her off because of His everlasting covenant with her, based on His steadfast love and faithfulness. (v 60, 62). God expects the same quality of faithfulness and love from Christian couples. He knows the awful pain and anguish which comes from relationship broken by unfaithfulness. But when at least one of the partners is prepared to be true and faithful to their covenant promises, God’s grace can operate, healing broken lives. When a Christian couple remember that their marriage vows and promises are permanent, for the whole of their lives, they can freely give to each other wholehearted love and forgiveness. God said He would never give up Israel: this is the pattern of love for Christians to have towards their partner. A pattern not of forgiving seven times, but seventy times seven. As we receive God’s forgiveness for ourselves, so His Spirit gives us strength to forgive our partners (Eph. 4: 32). Almost the last words in the Old Testament are these: “Another thing you do: you flood the Lord’s alter with tears. You weep and wail because He no longer pays attention to your ask, “Why?” It is because the Lord is acting as the witness between you and the wife of your youth, because you have broken faith with her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant.

“Has not the Lord made them one? In flesh and spirit they are His. And why one? because He was seeking godly offspring. So, guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith with the wife of your youth. I hate divorce, says the Lord God of Israel and I hate a man’s covering himself with violence as well as with his garment, says the Lord almighty.” Malachi 2:13-16 (NIV) Something similar is happening today. Christians are breaking faith with their partners (v14). Christians are following the example of the world in seeking divorce, especially in the west, Instead, they should acknowledge their need to strengthen one another in Christ. We in India need to learn to help one another as couples before it is too late. Even adultery is a chance for a couple to use the opportunity, with God’s help, of forgiving each other, rather than seeking divorce. Love covers over a multitude of sins (Peter 4:8) God hates divorce because it destroys His purpose of loving relationships. God delights in covenant love, based not on emotional or physical attractions, but flowing freely from the heart: a heart motivated by grace, and a will bound by promises of faithfulness.

-JOHN MARTIN