This topic is an ever green issue in the human society as it is one which evolves from generation to generation and from continent to continent. The progressiveness of each society in each generation makes it as an ever evolving element just as time and seasons change, in each society and continent. The advancement in science being an important contributing factor for this change. In any society be it any where in the globe there is always a generational “break” or gap between the young and the old and each society endeavours to bridge this by various means! Here is a very brief over-view in our present scenario and certain factors that inhibits the bridging process in Christian families, which may be of some help in this arena.

Communication and listening

Communication in the twenty first century has grown very much. This phenomenal growth, as we all are well aware of, is because of the technological advancement in the field of electronic science. Anything and every thing can be achieved by the click of a button and the world itself has snugly and cozily shrunk practically into the fist of every individual on earth.

Every thought that traverses the human mind – are like the waves of the ocean. They never cease. Hence this tech advancement in the electronic age has become an ideal companion to the restless mind! And this has disastrously evolved every individual of the homo sapien race into an island by themselves and everyone seems to be isolated from each other, though they be, in the midst of groups or gatherings, as one is seldom free from the mobile or tab or laptop even for a moment, which almost constantly demands the owners attention ever so often. In the Christian family this electronic invasion has become a great barrier for communication between family members. Of particular interest to cite is the ever common squabble by siblings for the control of the remote piece when two members vie for it when their favourite tv programme is on at the same time. Another example that disrupts the unity is the non- convergence of all family members at the dining table, at the specified time. An individual may be called away for a specific call or an online meet at that most crucial time of being at the dinner table together. These little things, gives room for breaks in interpersonal relationships amongst family members and destroys quality time for interaction among them in the basic family unit. As communication is a two way process, the other component is the listening component of this vital process. So if either one of these components are hampered the other one also gets equally hampered too. Families where these do not maintain its equilibrium well may, in the long run, head for an unhappy, not-an-harmonious life style. This will also lead the parent /grandparent syncing difficult, with each other, and particularly with the younger generation, as the dining table is an essential arena where the family bonding often revolves. This sync factor is very essential as it helps in getting across small messages with lasting impression to the young mind, present at the listening edge!

Respect to elders

This is the need of the hour for the present generation-for both the young and the old – to ponder quite seriously. The elders often feel let down when the young do not give due respect to their presence and the young feel that they are let down when the elders do not recognise their presence or value their views from their point of view. This ‘for- and -counter statements’ can seldom be resolved easily, but certain aspects of this conflict can be touched upon here. As discussed above, since the laptop, mobile, tv. etc takes priority in an individual’s daily routine, good values of paying respect to each other , and

in particular to the elderly, in the present age has taken a rear seat, in imparting such virtues. The primary reason is the time constraint’s which the individual

faces today, be it the young scholar from the kindergarten to the elite IT settled in a night shift. Every one is in a mighty rush for the next job to be attended to. Yet in the midst of these, the parent manages to squeeze some time in inculcating these values in giving respect to seniors, to the younger generation. A hasty wave of the hand or a monosyllable like a “Hi” is all that can be expected as the only sign of acknowledgement of respect to the elder group as a respectful greeting to the elderly, instead of taking time to stand for a moment and greet in the traditional gestures like ‘thothiram’ etc.

Speaking of traditional ways of respecting the elders like folding the hands together in the classical Indian greetings as of old viz. the ‘namaskaram or thothiram’ have been done away with, mostly today! However in Christian families this salutation is emphatically stressed at social gatherings particularly at weddings and important family programmes such as baptisms, engagements etc. Thanks to these blessed occasions the old and the young are able to have those lesser moments of rushing away to do the next job, as in daily routines. In these rare moments, the family elders do have an opportunity to speak about relationships, to the youngster, which paves the way for tracing genealogies. This is the most important moment for educating the younger ones and to construct a small bridge and to have a glimpse of their ancestral roots. It also gives a great scope to recount interesting anecdotes also about that particular individual to the younger family members. This will hopefully, leave a lasting memory to the listener and would further strengthen family ties. These blessed occasions would bridge the older to the younger folk, in a practical way, with a deeper family bonding and also enable posterity to be moulded in the right direction.

Story telling

This very important aspect in the family set up, is greatly stressed in this era. Every child in their formative years of their lives are always enthralled whenever they have a grandparent to tell them a story with great morals. But, alas in this twenty first era when all things have become “instant” from the preparation of ordinary beverages to regular meals every day, the ‘retired’ grandparent at home is often left with the chores of managing the home affairs as both parents are forced to work for that better life not only for the present, but also to save up for the future generations wellbeing. This robs away the better part of the grandparents’ moments of spending quality time with the toddler except when the toddler is to be fed with the noon meal, which is the ideal moment. The toddler also has to readjust to the home atmosphere after an alien surrounding, from the “day care/play school “ environ, to that of the home atmosphere! And often the kids’ ‘psyche’ begins to be displayed on the way home itself, which is too often pampered by a treat from the store by the wayside. The quality time is also too easily destroyed by handing the kid a tab to distract his/her attention. Hence this most valuable element in the bonding of the young with the older, is heavily compromised in these circumstances, which should be avoided at all costs.

Be that as it may, yet many a grandchild when they are grown up, do fondly recount their brief moments of joy, when they get an occasion to eulogise the grandparents at the thanksgiving gathering for the departed soul, moments when they were enthralled by this simple story telling periods spent with the grandparent!

The last word. As a take away message, it is to be noted that in many an occasion in the shaping of the younger generations wholistic progress, this twenty first media’s infiltration globally poses a great threat for bridging communication, listening, or even that joyous shared moments of interactions with the child-grandparent activity. Though the tech advancement be a boon to human society, yet it should not become a bane in the family scenario. This could only be circumvented if the parents and grandparents identify the wasteful moments snatched by tech inanities and guard against this electronic predator, which hampers every effort to build an harmonious relationship within/between generations and endeavour collectively to shoulder the responsibility of burdening themselves in constructing a firm prayer altar in the family with CHRIST as the chief cornerstone.